Recently I have started a new thing with my daughter.
She’s pretty cute, huh? She’s funny and sweet and feisty and sensitive all wrapped up in this package. (Now that one in the back…hahaha)
We bought a notebook that’s just for us. Looks kinda like this…
It’s open to anything. We can write feelings, fun stuff, things that are frustrating us about each other or anything and most importantly, anything that might seem tough to say face to face. It’s only gone back and forth a few times but I think it really has potential.
One thing I’m learning is that you’ve got to give kids space to share. Keep asking questions, be interested in what they are doing, but don’t harp on them. A lot of patience and very little”back in my day” works best for us. Hammering away only drives them into their shell.
Find a way that works for you and keep those lines open. I never want to get to a point in my kids’ lives and say “I had no idea that was going on”. They actually DO want to talk, but it really has to be carefully orchestrated, and served with a big helping of respect and trust and no judgement, from both sides.
Hope this has been helpful. Stick with it, parents. It’s painful sometimes but worth it in the end.
What works best for you?